Thursday, December 27, 2007

Waiting


Waiting is an interesting thing. We are all doing it. We are all waiting for something. A few months ago, I was waiting for a real job. A few months before that, I was always waiting to get called for a subbing position. That was fun. :P Other people are waiting for a baby, or waiting for some good news. Some are waiting to move. Others are waiting for their child to come home safely. Some are waiting for the right moment. But we all are waiting. Right now, I am waiting. Waiting for, as my grandma calls him, my prince. She says he's coming. I'm starting to wonder. :)

But the real question is am I waiting well? Waiting takes time. And the question is if I am using that time in a manner that honors God. Am I moping around because God hasn't answered my earnest and fervent prayers. Am I only looking at myself? Am I wasting the precious time God has given to me? All that happened with Mike has shown me that time is fleeting. You don't know when yours is over. Therefore, I must use mine wisely.

While pondering the thought of waiting, a verse came to mind. Titus 2:13--"Waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ." Wow! That is what we are ultimately waiting for. The husband and kids and job and house and all that stuff really do not matter in the grand scheme of things. The return of Jesus does. Will He be pleased with my waiting time? How do I make sure that I live a life He will be pleased with as I am waiting? He tells us in the prior verses.
For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age. Titus 2:11-12

I need to turn away from the ungodliness of this world and be sober and righteous in my life. As I live my day to day life, if I am consumed with what I am waiting for here on earth, I will not be living a righteous life. In fact, I will be living an idolatrous life. Putting myself and my worldly passions ahead of my Lord and His will. I need to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus. As a friend reminded me today...
Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act. Psalm 37:3-5

So my prince may come tomorrow. He may come in 10 years. He may not come at all. But if my eyes are fixed on Jesus as I am waiting, the time will be well spent.

Monday, December 17, 2007

crazy

Life has truly been crazy the last few weeks. Going back and forth between Amy's house and my house. And Becky came home. And I've been kinda sick (but I'm fighting it!!) Busy busy.

There have been some major things on my mind too. Big decisions that I am trying to make. I don't really think they should be taking this much time and energy. I should be trusting God a lot more and I'm not. So I'll probably have a few ulcers by the time this is all over from my worrying. I'm so scared of making a bad decision.

But as Mike always said...you are going to make them. And then you deal with the consequences. But that's part of life, right? Ahh!!

I miss him so much!

Prayer bends our wills to God's will, which is what submitting our lives is all about. Prayer then is not about getting God to do my bidding, but the shaping and bending of my will until it aligns with His.
--Disciplines of a Godly Woman by Barbara Hughes


I guess I just need to pray more, huh?

Saturday, December 8, 2007

New Phase

Well, today started a new phase in my life...it'll only last 2 months, but it's still a phase. I am living with my friend Amy until the end of January. It's kinda scary and all really new. I'd even say it's all pretty unsettling. But it will be good for me...a huge growing experience. Don't you think at almost 26 yrs old it's time for that? I'm sure it is...I just have to tell myself that over and over again. ahhh!!!